Where has the time gone???

Today was easier for me than most moms. I did not put my five year old on a bus, or drive them to school and drop them off. I simply have to come to the realization that "my baby" is going to Kindergarten, or rather she is "in" Kindergarten. Since, we home school it is not as traumatic as dropping her off but the finality of the fact that I know longer have a toddler, or even a preschooler is harsh! I don't like it one bit! I miss my babies, I miss the sleepless nights, I miss the rocking, the crying, the diaper changing and realizing that those days are gone and over sometimes really hurts me. That fact that I now have a first grader and a kindergartner at home is wonderful that my children have grown to be such amazing kids, but sad that the time is passing me so quickly. My mind starts racing ahead and I fear the inevitable. The first date, the driving, college, and the list goes on! When I realize how fast these last seven years have gone by I fear how quickly the next seven year will be. I remember when I had Ethan and Scarlett, I thought it couldn't get any better. I thought that my heart couldn't hold the love I felt for them. But you know what, it has grown exponentially with each year. In this picture Scarlett had just turned one years old and it seems like yesterday! These two have become my best friends. They are my constant companions. I miss them terribly when I am gone. Can you tell I am a little upset that my babies are getting so big and that my "baby baby" is going to school!

I do home school, so I will still be with them each and every day but homeschooling brings on a whole new list of fears. Last year when Ethan started kindergarten I had this same fear. What if I ruin my children? What if I hinder their learning? Worse yet, what if I lessen their desire to learn? So many fears are running constant. Am I doing the right thing? Is it what is best for them? So may "what ifs". I want so bad to be what they need me to be. I pray each and every morning that I will be a example of God's love to my children. I pray for patience and understanding. I pray that my actions and thoughts each day are Godly and that my children are secure in knowing how much I love them and how much I want the best for them. So many thoughts and fears going into homeschooling two children. Having the responsibility of teaching two very different kids with very different learning styles. Please keep me in your prayers as we begin this journey. Pray that it is a wonderful journey for our family and that God continues to bless our home.

"For I am confident of this very thing that he who began a good work
in you will perfect it until the day of Jesus Christ." Philippians 1:6

Every good and perfect gift comes from above and I thank the Lord everyday for my precious children. The Lord gave me the gift of being their mother and I have been so blessed.

We actually will not start until after Labor Day. The first day of school has me in a tizzy of nerves! I am sad and fearful all in one.

To all the mothers that took their children for their first day of school today. To all the moms that dropped off their kindergartners for the very first time, I hope it was a blessed day! I hope your children had a wonderful first day of this new journey.


and to my beautiful Scarlett, I hope this is an amazing journey for us both! I pray that I will have the patience and the understanding to be the kind of teacher and mother you need me to be. I love you, my little kindergarten baby!